At some point in the near future; and no, I'm not telling you when; I shall have a birthday. A fact which, when realised; I don't celebrate or even acknowledge my birthday, and haven't for a long while; prompted me to have a wander down memory lane and share with you all some memorable birthday moments from my childhood.
Except there doesn't seem to have been any.
I've wracked my brain, I really have, but with the exception of this story , I've
got nothing. It seems my ambivalence toward birthdays was present and
correct even from a very early age.
A fact which surprised me, if I'm being honest. While I haven't exactly
given the subject a lot of thought in recent years, I certainly never
had any kind of feeling of having missed out on this stuff as a child;
in the long, long, looooong list of festering resentments that I
harbour, this one doesn't feature.
The fact remains though, that for whatever reason, I have no memories
of childhood birthdays other than the story linked above and a vague
idea that the bike used so creatively by my mother in this post was a birthday
gift at some point, I genuinely can't dredge up any birthday memories
It's possible that the events in question were so traumatic that I
blacked them out. If that were the case it could even account for my
current lack of any kind of excitement about the prospect of my 'big
day'. On the other hand, and I'll concede that this may be the more
likely scenario, it could just be that I'm getting old and my memory is
Whichever is the case, it seems that all the good intentions I had when
I sat down at the keyboard to type this post, of telling a heartwarming
tale of familial affection and mercenary gift grabbing, have gone out
the window. I have failed you, dear reader; you came here to be
entertained and I give you nothing. Nothing! I can only throw myself at
your mercy, and hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive a
wretch like me.
Sayonara, and keep being awesome.